If I were a jury choosing the person of the year, I
would choose Felix Baumgartner. Because he is full with the desire of flying
and broke a world record jumping from 39km height. He was born in 20th
April 1969 in Salzburg, which is a city in Australia. He has always forced both
the limit of a manned flight and his own limit. When he was 16 he started
skydiving. Moreover, he was a member of the Austrian army with a responsibility
for show and race, so he developed his flight skills at that time. In 1988, he
started to exhibit skydiving shows for Red Bull. Felix’s adventurous soul and
Red Bull’s way of extraordinary thinking have matched and they have been
cooperating since those days. Now, I want to mention his success a little. He has
been the first person crossing the English Channel with a particular carbon
fiber wing. He achieved the world’s first jump from Christ the Redeemer Statue.
He also jumped with parachute from Turning Torso in 2006. In 2007, he was again
the first person to jump from the ninety-first floor of the building of Taipei
101. In addition to these successes; his most important one is his exceeding
the sound wall, with no suspicion. He started to go up with a capsule which
heighted 1360 kg in helium balloon from New Mexico. The rise lasted almost two
and half an hour. When he reached 39.000 km, he jumped from the balloon and
reached 1165 speed per hour. He could land successfully after six minutes. This
was enough to break a world record, and of course he did. I really appreciate
his passion about skydiving or jump. I enjoy this kind of extreme sports, so I
prefer choosing him as the person of the year. I think he deserves it with this
adventurous soul in him. Blog Listem
27 Ocak 2014 Pazartesi
reflection 3
If I were a jury choosing the person of the year, I
would choose Felix Baumgartner. Because he is full with the desire of flying
and broke a world record jumping from 39km height. He was born in 20th
April 1969 in Salzburg, which is a city in Australia. He has always forced both
the limit of a manned flight and his own limit. When he was 16 he started
skydiving. Moreover, he was a member of the Austrian army with a responsibility
for show and race, so he developed his flight skills at that time. In 1988, he
started to exhibit skydiving shows for Red Bull. Felix’s adventurous soul and
Red Bull’s way of extraordinary thinking have matched and they have been
cooperating since those days. Now, I want to mention his success a little. He has
been the first person crossing the English Channel with a particular carbon
fiber wing. He achieved the world’s first jump from Christ the Redeemer Statue.
He also jumped with parachute from Turning Torso in 2006. In 2007, he was again
the first person to jump from the ninety-first floor of the building of Taipei
101. In addition to these successes; his most important one is his exceeding
the sound wall, with no suspicion. He started to go up with a capsule which
heighted 1360 kg in helium balloon from New Mexico. The rise lasted almost two
and half an hour. When he reached 39.000 km, he jumped from the balloon and
reached 1165 speed per hour. He could land successfully after six minutes. This
was enough to break a world record, and of course he did. I really appreciate
his passion about skydiving or jump. I enjoy this kind of extreme sports, so I
prefer choosing him as the person of the year. I think he deserves it with this
adventurous soul in him.
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Hi Haticenur ,
YanıtlaSilAs every time you do , you've made a good job again :).The subject is interesting,good choice :).However ,there are some little mistakes . I will try to correct them as much as I can do.
Firstly there are some punctuation mistakes such as '' When he was 16 he started skydiving.'' . To correct this little mistake I think using comma before the main clause will be aproppriate.Apat from this,I noticed a small mistake about the usage of relative clauses : ''He has been the first person crossing the English Channel with a particular carbon fiber wing.''. When saying 'the first person crossing' ,you should use infinitive not gerund .Actually it must resulted from careflessness because you have made so many sentences with the same strucrute and the usage of it is true in them.
In terms of content and organization , there is no mistake. As for other grammatical mistakes I can't see any mistakes other than the ones that I have just said. It is pleasure to read your writings for me. I am looking forward to read your new writings .Good job Haticenur . Keep going like this. :)
Hi Mervenur,
YanıtlaSilThank you for your helpful comments. I wasn't careful while writing, I think. I will revise them and correct thanks to you :)